Disclaimer: Don't read this review if you are offended by four letter words and genital slang. Thank you. Some bands strive to enlighten their listeners with intelligent, philosophical lyrics. Other groups promote vegetarianism, veganism, or the straight edge lifestyle through their music. Then there's Johnny Vomit: five guys dedicated to getting sloshed and playing music. After looking over their album art and lyrics insert -complete with topless strippers posing with the band on every other page - I had a general vibe about Johnny Vomit. I really expected this to be a joke band. A banner on their website for their most recent album, Extreme Championship Drinking, reads: "An album so depraved, it took 20 years to make." I truly hope this record did not take a score of years to complete, because it's no tour de force. It only takes one look at the song titles on Extreme Championship Drinking to you know what you're getting into. I couldn't believe I was listening to songs entitled "Rock "n' Roll Pussy Hole," "Tuna Taco," "Fuck," "Beer Bong Barf Bag," and "What the Fuck." Seriously, guys, what the fuck? The middle school humor deep down inside of me stirred for a … Read more
Andrew W.K. is the latest Renaissance man in the world of music. Like others before him, John Lennon and Henry … Read more
There's an awkward goofiness to the Start Today album, or any of the first fifteen Revelation releases, that will always … Read more
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Remember that kid in middle and high school you pushed around, called him a fag, and turned his great day to shit? Well, that kid rests in me. And that kid rests singer John Caution, and that kid means more to me than your insults ever will. The torturous years of withholding rage are now released and pressed on analog format in the form of the Torture EP. Weekend Nachos keeps its message clear and simple: fuck you. Torture opens the gates of Dimension X with the introduction "End of Your Faith," a sludgy prelude to the onslaught of powerful violence, and by powerful violence I mean powerviolence. This is not that To Live a Lie trendviolence, this is actual powerviolence taking nods from the likes of Infest and Crossed … Read more
Broken Poets' lead singer/songwriter dynamo, Tim McDonald, is truly the voice of the average American male in that his songwriting, melodies, and vocal delivery are completely, uh, average. Just don't tell him that. Nearly every part of this album feels equal parts contrived and self-important "" the album name (only two of the twelve songs are actually in E Minor), … Read more
Bands need to stop trying to sound like Gang of Four. It's a fact that they will never be Gang of Four, and no one ever will be. Of course there will be cover bands, but those songs are Gang of Four songs. Leave the repetition for Clear Channel Radio, such memorable music isn't meant to be over played. The … Read more
Imagine sitting out on your porch or patio on a warm summer evening. You feel like just kicking back and relaxing while enjoying a light breeze. As corny as that sounds, this is what comes to mind for me when I listen to The Sea and Cake. Everything seems to flow almost effortlessly, just telling you to relax. However, it … Read more
This record really surprised me. When I got it, I was excited about the fact that they are a power metal band. I can't get enough of the stuff, so naturally I was stoked. I started checking out the CD insert and saw that they are from Germany. Germany has given birth to some of my favorite power metal bands. … Read more
Every now and then, there is a singer that catches your ear with a beautiful, unique voice. In 2004, Leslie Feist was that person when she released her solo album, Let it Die, to international acclaim. She has returned to form this year with her new album, The Reminder, a collection of songs that focuses more on the uniqueness of … Read more
Something I've always had trouble imagining is five grown men sitting in a room, writing music that directly appeals to fourteen-year-old girls, and being totally happy with themselves. Maybe it's my own musical snobbery, but I can't believe that these bands go to sleep at night, creatively satisfied, and legitimately thinking that the music they write is worth anything. They … Read more
I've noticed that pop music has gone through a lot of changes in the last few years. One thing I've noticed is the misconceptions of what people call "original" as something that sounds exactly like what's popular at the moment. The opening sentence in the press kit for this album is as follows "C'mon, admit it! It's been years since … Read more
Chuck Ragan used to play guitar in Hot Water Music, who happened to be one of my favorite bands of all time. He left Hot Water Music to lead his own life, which left us with The Draft in his place. Now we have a solo effort from Mr. Ragan and I can't help to wonder if Los Feliz were … Read more
What if The Libertines were basically decent guys? What about the early Rolling Stones, or Guns N' Roses, or any of the bands who just want to play some rock and fucking roll? I mean like if they didn't ruin their girlfriend's lives and if they didn't smoke crack and if they maybe mowed the lawn for their moms once … Read more
Like their peers Limp Bizkit, Korn and Slipknot, Linkin Park occupies the mysterious musical category of "Oh, they're still around?" In 2007, with the nu-metal genre almost completely replaced by nu-emo, the lumbering rap-rock of these late 90s behemoths is missing and presumed dead. So where does that leave Linkin Park? In the commercial musical world, it's evolve or die, … Read more
Hour of the Wolf are one of the best punk bands in America-trust me. It's a familiar story, kind of a Zen thing (like the tree falling in a vacant forest), but The World Is Different Now: thanks to the Internet, the local band you always knew to be better than any national contenders can now play in the big … Read more
Daggermouth's 2005 release, Stallone was a really solid record. For me, the band came along at a time when no new bands were really catching on with me. I was hooked on Stallone from the start and I've been riding the hype train with The 'Mouth ever since. Turf Wars was certainly a long time in the making, but I … Read more
I've always thought of The Lawrence Arms' guitarist Chris McCaughan as a bit of a lyrical genius, being able to ever so eloquently put to those seemingly indescribable feelings of your mid-twenties to words. The real magic of his game is the ability to do all of this over the distorted guitars and colossal drums that are often the foreground … Read more
For the most part, there is no concept to Death Metal other thanââ¬Â¦..well, death. Lofty ideas or "concepts" are usually left to the Power Metal bunch who just looooove to show off their epic sagas with tales of wizards and ghosts and pumpkins and whatnot. This also affords them the opportunity to tell a story, usually in great length, interspersed … Read more
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